Beginning a New Era

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We got the results of Hubby’s biopsy on Saturday. He does have cancer, thankfully (if there can be such a thing with that kind of diagnosis), his cancer is due to a virus and usually responds well to treatment.

We spent the rest of the weekend at home, quietly, just enjoying each other’s company and resting up for the fight ahead.

His Ear-Nose-Throat doctor is supposed to make an appointment with our local oncologist for sometime this week.

He told the children we still have contact with (including our youngest daughter who is currently not really speaking to us) and heard back from two of the three kids. I have also developed my own support system because I know that I will need them at some point in this battle.

Thankfully, none of the people we told came over this past weekend. Neither one of us wanted company. We just wanted peace and quiet to come to terms with this diagnosis and all the ramifications and changes to come to our lives.

Now, onward and upward toward the battle!

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More on this later my lovelies.

Storm on the Horizon

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Reflections

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As this year passes into the next, I am put into a reflective mood.

I tried and failed to become independent of my husband. He hasn’t changed, but the way I view our marriage has changed.

My attempt to leave has brought out a deep fissure between our daughter and us. I am trying to heal that wound, but will take time and patience as she is very angry and I am only just now learning what brings her anger out against us.

Our son has become my husband’s best friend, which I am so thrilled about. They really have always needed to be close, but I think I must have been in the way since their closeness came about while we were separated.

Our son has his girlfriend living in this state now, instead of way up north of here. She is such a fun person! I am really happy that he has finally found someone who loves him as much as she does and someone I love to have around as well! She is the first one who realized that I was going toward Paganism and learning to trust my own intuition and “witchyness”.

I am growing and learning in my chosen lifestyle and enjoying my world much more than I have for a very long time. We cleaned and winterized a section of the yard for me to plant next spring. That will be my witch’s garden. I have also started herb seedlings and picked up some growing herbs from Dillons for inside this winter.  Hubby & I picked up a couple of metal plant stands from someone down the road from us. The larger one is holding my herbs in front of the stationary glass door in the family room. I am looking forward to cleaning and de-cluttering the family room and being able to use the table in that room very soon!

We have cleaned and de-cluttered the front bedroom and now have a really nice bed in there. We have cleaned and de-cluttered the office closet and are now using that as a pantry and the office is now so clean and repainted and has become one of my happy places!

Our front room has been rearranged and we are much happier in there as well. We do have more work to do in the front bedroom and the front room, but we are happy with what we have done so far. It has made a world of difference in our home.

My husband has some serious health issues which are now coming to light. He has surgery early in the morning for a biopsy on his tonsil. We are preparing for the worst news but hoping for the best.  That is all we can do at this point since we essentially know nothing.

Blessed Be and Go In Good Health Until We Meet Again.

Storm on the Horizon

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Exploring a New Religion

I have been searching for a religion that I can believe in and accept for a long time. Having been raised as a Methodist, I have been disappointed by the mainstream churches in my area and the people who control them.

My heart follows nature and that is where I find my greatest peace, so, I am exploring Wicca. No, I am not worshiping satan or anything like that! I appreciate nature and everything she has to offer. My best days have always started with the beauty of a wonder-filled sunrise, and ended with the wonder of a beautiful sunset.

In my exploration, I am reading ‘Wicca for Beginners’ by Gillian Nolan.

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I haven’t gotten very far in this book yet, but I have several passages highlighted in pink! Yes, PINK! I am loving that color right now.

I have also bought a few different crystals to help clear my heart, mind and soul. Since I have been reading and trying to follow the ideas in the books I have been reading (some are on my Kindle), I do feel much more in control of myself, not as “scattered”, and have been able to actually sit for extended periods of time without just vegeing in front of the television.

I am learning to read Tarot and have been spending time with my deck each morning before I go to work. Quiet, relaxing music (thank you Aura App) and a peaceful feel in my kitchen have gone a long way toward making me feel comfortable in my own home again.

I am also learning about the crystals and their properties, now wearing black onyx and green jasper for protection and will have moonstone before my birthday! Each of these have healing and protective properties, so I can continue to heal myself.

These steps I am making must be working because my daughter has contacted her dad & I with some very angry words and a threat with no foundation. So, I will continue on this path and deal with the fall-out as best I can.

Wish me luck!

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Storm on the Horizon