This morning was one of those difficult ones, the kind that you wish you could just go back to bed and call it a day already! Hubby was not happy about my shopping trip yesterday (even though I got him some warm and comfortable fleece clothes to wear for his cancer treatments), and he woke up in a fowl mood, accusing me of having a lover again! After he left for work, I sat at my altar and just let all of those feelings wash over me and dissipate in the air. After a short while, I felt so much better and looked in the dish that holds some of my crystals. Two of them called me so I picked them up, I tried to put them back into the dish, but they wouldn’t drop from my hand, so I stuffed them into my bra for the drive to work.
The crystals were Carnelian and Tigers Eye. I feel so much more in control of my emotions and nowhere near as angry and frustrated as I had been feeling. Thank you, Gaia, for teaching this lesson to me today.
On another subject, we will be going to Hubby’s cancer team meeting early Monday morning. This meeting should give us the information about what stage his cancer is in, how far it has spread, and give us a clearer image of what treatments to expect. I am nervous as well as ready to find out. Waiting is hard for both of us. Again, Gaia knew what I needed when she guided me to these crystals.
I have been amazed at how accurate my intuition is very quickly becoming! I am also amazed at the ease in which I have been able to release Hubby’s foul words and accusations. Just a few weeks ago, I would have been in a deep misery with the accusations he was throwing around like confetti this morning. Now, I am so much more in-tune with my deeper self that his petty hurtfulness rolls off of me like rainwater. I understand that he is in pain, is worried and afraid, and this is his way of getting that out of his system (no, he really doesn’t care who he hurts as long as he can feel better). I understand that he is a toxic person, but I also know that I cannot leave him, especially while he is fighting for his life.
This deeper understanding of me has seriously helped me heal from all of the past abuse. I see myself getting stronger and more whole than I have been in a very long time.
Here’s to healing myself from the soul outward!
Until next time, Blessed Be
Storm on the Horizon